Stress
I've got stress on my mind. No, no, not that I am stressed but literally have stress on my mind!
I think about stress a lot.
A whole lot - what causes "stress"; why people get "stressed"; why different people react differently to the same "stress"; should you let yourself be "stressed" - duly or unduly;
I see people losing weight because they are "stressed" and, frankly, I am envious! Not of the stressed out state but of the weight loss! If only I could let myself be that stressed! I also have seen people breakdown emotionally from "stress". And the madness of the mad people on our streets must have been caused by some kind of "stress", don't you think? By the way, I do not see as many as I used to - or is it that I need to get out more?
Stress isn't always a bad thing either - it drives some people to otherwise unachievable heights in personal achievement.
But today, it is the bad "stress" I'm referring to.
"Stress", I figure, is something almost everyone experiences at some stage in their lives. It's normal, right? Things do not go the way they should, plans go awry due to no-one's fault (hmmm...really??) people do not do what they should when or how, they should; demands on one's time, finances, emotions - all of these things individually or collectively conspire to "stress a person out"!
But how we react to that stress, in my opinion, is what defines our ability to handle it, and ultimately the state of our mental, physical, emotional and psychological wellbeing.
I learned, very early on in life, thanks to my parents, to be practical about stressors (things that may/can cause stress.) To deal with stressors or the problems that arise in the course of this wonderful journey called Life, a clear head, a calm mind and the ability to laugh at yourself and in the face of problems are important tools. Getting all upset or tied up in knots never solved ANY problem - if anything, it compounds things! How can you think about finding a solution if you can't have cohesive and constructive thoughts? Plus, it's a damn waste of time AND energy that could be channelled into the exercise of finding a solution to the problem at hand.
So, I have a situation/problem. I take a few minutes to be REALLY upset about the situation (heck, I've been known to take a couple of days to just wallow!) That means I rant, rave, wail, feel sorry for myself, do the "why me" chant or whatever I need to do to get the negativity out of my system. I personally believe this is a very important step in the process of dealing with stress.
After that, I talk to or have a brief meeting with myself. The talk usually goes like this "O girl, you better stop this nonsense! Na only you dey this world? Na only you get problem? People problem big pass dis nah, and dem never kpeme o! Oya, quick quick, shake body. Msschewww, you siddon dey cry, dey complain! Abeg!"
The talk may vary in vocabulary & language (pidgin is my favorite language of self-admonishment though), but never in content & context! I start off by educating myself on the problem (yes o, omo Prof ni mi) and usually, in the course of that education, the solution/s may become apparent. And the adage that says "there is nothing new under the sun" is reinforced. Just think of the most improbable thing that could happen & Google it - someone somewhere would have experienced it.
I also learned that not every problem has a solution and that I just have to accept that. Really. Do not let mathematicians fool you - we all know that there is no real answer to "If 2x + 3y = ?"
My "x" and "y" are and always will be very different from yours and another's "x" and "y"and vice versa. Example, if x na oranges and y na pieces of pomo, wetin go be the answer? The best answer go be "chop chop"! Abi, how una see am?
This year, I decided that any "stress" which, if & when solved, would not add to or improve my emotional, psychological and financial wellbeing in any way or manner wouldn't be worth my time & energy and so would be ignored. A seemingly simplistic (and a tad selfish) approach but one that works amazingly well!
And to the "stressed out" people out there, you have my sympathy. Remember, your stress-cross may seem heavy but always remember - it could be much, much, MUCH heavier!
I think about stress a lot.
A whole lot - what causes "stress"; why people get "stressed"; why different people react differently to the same "stress"; should you let yourself be "stressed" - duly or unduly;
I see people losing weight because they are "stressed" and, frankly, I am envious! Not of the stressed out state but of the weight loss! If only I could let myself be that stressed! I also have seen people breakdown emotionally from "stress". And the madness of the mad people on our streets must have been caused by some kind of "stress", don't you think? By the way, I do not see as many as I used to - or is it that I need to get out more?
Stress isn't always a bad thing either - it drives some people to otherwise unachievable heights in personal achievement.
But today, it is the bad "stress" I'm referring to.
"Stress", I figure, is something almost everyone experiences at some stage in their lives. It's normal, right? Things do not go the way they should, plans go awry due to no-one's fault (hmmm...really??) people do not do what they should when or how, they should; demands on one's time, finances, emotions - all of these things individually or collectively conspire to "stress a person out"!
But how we react to that stress, in my opinion, is what defines our ability to handle it, and ultimately the state of our mental, physical, emotional and psychological wellbeing.
I learned, very early on in life, thanks to my parents, to be practical about stressors (things that may/can cause stress.) To deal with stressors or the problems that arise in the course of this wonderful journey called Life, a clear head, a calm mind and the ability to laugh at yourself and in the face of problems are important tools. Getting all upset or tied up in knots never solved ANY problem - if anything, it compounds things! How can you think about finding a solution if you can't have cohesive and constructive thoughts? Plus, it's a damn waste of time AND energy that could be channelled into the exercise of finding a solution to the problem at hand.
So, I have a situation/problem. I take a few minutes to be REALLY upset about the situation (heck, I've been known to take a couple of days to just wallow!) That means I rant, rave, wail, feel sorry for myself, do the "why me" chant or whatever I need to do to get the negativity out of my system. I personally believe this is a very important step in the process of dealing with stress.
After that, I talk to or have a brief meeting with myself. The talk usually goes like this "O girl, you better stop this nonsense! Na only you dey this world? Na only you get problem? People problem big pass dis nah, and dem never kpeme o! Oya, quick quick, shake body. Msschewww, you siddon dey cry, dey complain! Abeg!"
The talk may vary in vocabulary & language (pidgin is my favorite language of self-admonishment though), but never in content & context! I start off by educating myself on the problem (yes o, omo Prof ni mi) and usually, in the course of that education, the solution/s may become apparent. And the adage that says "there is nothing new under the sun" is reinforced. Just think of the most improbable thing that could happen & Google it - someone somewhere would have experienced it.
I also learned that not every problem has a solution and that I just have to accept that. Really. Do not let mathematicians fool you - we all know that there is no real answer to "If 2x + 3y = ?"
My "x" and "y" are and always will be very different from yours and another's "x" and "y"and vice versa. Example, if x na oranges and y na pieces of pomo, wetin go be the answer? The best answer go be "chop chop"! Abi, how una see am?
This year, I decided that any "stress" which, if & when solved, would not add to or improve my emotional, psychological and financial wellbeing in any way or manner wouldn't be worth my time & energy and so would be ignored. A seemingly simplistic (and a tad selfish) approach but one that works amazingly well!
And to the "stressed out" people out there, you have my sympathy. Remember, your stress-cross may seem heavy but always remember - it could be much, much, MUCH heavier!
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